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"Seven Blessings for One Marriage"

A Poem by Virginia Knowles

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Last week, I wrote a poem for my daughter Mary and her fiance Ryan called "Seven Blessings for One Marriage." This may sound like an odd title, but my future son-in-law loves messianic (Christian) Judaism, and he was telling me recently how the number seven holds great Biblical symbolism.  I printed the poem on a good quality cotton paper, and then Joanna added the embellishments along the sides using strips of scrapbooking paper, which go nicely with the silver-grey frame.   You can see a picture of it on-line in the blog post.

(P.S. in May: Now that the wedding is over, you can see some of the pictures and an explanation of the messianic ceremony at: Mary's Wedding on Virginia's Blog.)

Seven Blessings for One Marriage

by Virginia Knowles

Reverence
As you stand side by side in humble awe of Him,
Devote and purify your hearts to please the Holy One in whom
Justice and mercy met on the cross.

Wisdom
As you ponder the mysteries and epiphanies of life,
Think, imagine, listen, linger, and reflect with one another.
Learn from the LORD and His Word: Know and then do.

Light
As you reflect the larger luminescence,
Seek to mirror the marriage of Messiah and his beloved Bride,
A radiant, translucent testimony of grace and glory.

Purpose
As you embark on a journey of excellence together,
Move forward faithfully and fruitfully as partners
On your mission: a grand adventure of faith and destiny.

Joy
As you drink of the abundant sparkling fountain,
Make a merry melody and holy harmony to celebrate our Creator,
Who beautifully fashioned each of you for each other.

Peace
As you confess, forgive, reconcile, respect, and embrace,
Let shalom, wholeness, blossom as an olive branch,
And you shall be united in the One who makes all things new.

Love
As you commit to cherish and nurture one another,
Surrender, serve, and sacrifice with loyalty and affection
In the sacred marriage which our God has entrusted to you.

May these blessings be yours in the LORD!

~*~*~

I presented the framed poem to Mary at her bridal shower.  Later that day I gave Ryan his own copy, and he mentioned that during the wedding, the rabbi will actually pronounce seven blessings (Sheva Brachot) in Hebrew and in English.  They are having a mostly Jewish wedding with at least the key elements like the chuppah (wedding canopy), the bride circling the groom, the ketubah (marriage contract), crushing the glass and more. There will even be Hebrew dancing at the reception, led by members of Gesher Shalom's dance worship team. It's going to be a cultural experience for all of us since none of us (including the groom's family) grew up Jewish. You can find out more at "How To Celebrate a Traditional Jewish Wedding"  Mary received a little box in the mail that day from Tel Aviv, Israel. It was Ryan's wedding ring -- and not an ordinary one! It has the Hebrew words for "I am my beloved's and he is mine" pierced all the way through it. Way cool!  It reminds me that Thad bought my engagement ring in Israel when he was on a trip with his dad.  I went to Israel in 1980 on a mission trip and still have a lot of my own interesting souvenirs.  Ryan and Mary hope to go there in a couple of years.

It also dawned on me that day that Ryan reminds me of my father-in-law, Ted Knowles, who passed away in 1997.  Ted loved to travel (he visited over 100 foreign countries and worked in many of them for months at a time), he had an insatiable appetite for learning, he enjoyed meeting new people, he loved to laugh and have fun, he worked hard, and he lived as simply and unpretentiously as he could, but was so generous with others (including our family).  He used to take our girls to concerts and plays, bring them little treats, read story books to them, and sing silly songs.  He would have loved to meet Ryan, but now at least I'm happy to see Ryan picking up where Ted left off.  We are blessed. 

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"Do Cry"

 

"Do Cry"
by Virginia Knowles

Do cry
There is no shame
When teardrops fall as healing rain
Our Comforter who sees and knows
Collects them all in his bottle.
Do they mingle there with ancient tears of long ago?
Or far-flung ones around the globe?
I do not know, nor do I always know why I cry
Just that there is a deep welling up inside
Or perhaps a thorn prick of conscience
Or an oozing scrape of disappointment
Or a dagger thrust of insult
Or even the gashing grief of death
As blood flows, so do tears
But they are wiped away
By One who also binds up wounds.

Do cry
But not from indulgent self-pity
Or twisting others to comply
Cry to wash the soul
Turn the heart with fresh resolve
A firmness born from tenderness
Cry for justice, mercy
Mourn for suffering that is not your own
To hear the groans and seek to console
With the comfort you yourself have received
There is a blessing in brokenness
Do cry: then go on in love and joy and peace.

~*~*~

Put my tears in your bottle. Are they not in your book? ~ Psalm 56:8

Those who sow in tears shall reap with shouts of joy! ~ Psalm 126:5

Weeping may tarry for the night, but joy comes with the morning. ~ Psalm 30:5

You have turned for me my mourning into dancing. ~ Psalm 30:11

A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance. ~ Ecclesiastes. 3:4

Blessed are you who weep now, for you shall laugh. ~ Luke 6:21

She has wet my feet with her tears and wiped them with her hair. ~ Luke 7:44

Jesus wept. ~ John 11:35

Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep. ~ Romans 12:15

He will wipe away every tear from their eyes. ~ Revelation 21:1

~*~*~

Why cry? Why not? 

There are things to cry about out there!  Our own circle of friends and family has been recently touched by cancer diagnoses, financial crises, divorces, wayward children, suicide, substance abuse, and other heart-wrenching situations. I see so much pain around me, and a lot of times I can’t do anything about it except for pray for them and feel it with them, sometimes with tears.  But I do try to do something tangible when I can, like give plenty of hugs, lend an encouraging book, send a helpful web link, or bring them a meal.

And then there is the world at large. Several weeks ago I substitute taught a 5th-6th grade history class at our Providence Home Educators co-op. To supplement the text book chapter about Germany in World War II, I brought in a poignant and haunting picture book called The Harmonica by Tony Johnston about a boy in a concentration camp. I warned the class that I would choke up and cry at the end, as I always do when reading it to my own children, and I certainly held true to my word. Later, when I told our friend Gary about this, he wrote, “Your crying after reading the book to the kids was no doubt a great gift to them. I remember very few lectures in seminary, but one in particular stands out. A history professor gave a lecture on early Christian martyrs, ending with Tertullian's famous phrase, "the blood of the martyrs is the seed of the church." He began weeping--something he had never done in class before--and had to immediately leave the room. That stuck with me--this isn't academic, it was real, and it SHOULD move us.”  And that is exactly what I was trying to impress upon my students! We must be affected by what is going on (or has gone on) in the world around us. The holocaust is just one example, and six million is not a mere number! Each victim had a name, a face, a story.  (I have written more on the holocaust a little later in the newsletter.)  We all have stories. And we all should cry over injustice – and do something about it when we can.  Persecution against Christians is still raging on around the world.  Perhaps if "the blood of the martyrs is the seed of the church" those seeds are best watered by the tears of God's saints!  That would be us!   

My oldest daughter Mary and I were talking recently, sitting on my bed late at night.  I was heart-weary and in tears, and she spoke such sweet words of comfort and encouragement to me. On the cusp of graduating with a journalism degree with a minor in history, she also thanked me for teaching her to think deeply about the issues of the larger world and not just sheltering her in our four walls.  Isn't part of home schooling teaching our kids to care in their hearts and then with their hands?  It is not always pretty, but it is worth the effort.  You will learn something, too, I promise.

And sometimes we do cry just for ourselves. That is OK, too, as long as we don't get too mired in our emotions or use tears to manipulate others.  I feel embarrassed to cry in public, but that hasn't stopped me from doing it much more frequently than I would like - usually because I am tired, hormonal, overwhelmed or keenly seeing my failures to love others as I should. But I remind myself that other folks are probably relieved to know they aren't the only ones who struggle with their emotions.   And there is usually someone around to console me when I feel like a total fool.  It's OK to be real. 

I love the music of Sara Groves, though I didn’t “get” what she was trying to sing about when Thad first gave me her CD All Right Here many years ago. I just bought her newer release Add to the Beauty, and the song "Just Showed Up for My Own Life" really affirms my thoughts on our emotions -- things I have been trying to communicate, less poetically, for the past year or so. Perhaps you might relate to some of the words (taken from the middle of the song):

I'm going to live my life inspired
Look for the holy in the common place
Open the windows and feel all that's honest and real until I'm truly amazed
I'm going to feel all my emotions
I'm going to look you in the eyes
I'm going to listen and hear until it's finally clear and it changes our lives
There are so many ways to hide
There are so many ways not to feel
There are so many ways to deny what is real
And I just showed up for my own life
And I'm standing here taking it in and it sure looks bright

Note: I bought this in a dual sided CD/DVD format from Christian Book Distributors for $5, but when it came, I found it was in the wrong format (.WMA) for transferring to my MP3 player.  I really want to do that, but instead of buying the CD in the regular format for $14, I am individually downloading a few of the songs I like best from here: Add to the Beauty music downloads.

Do cry, do feel, do live! 

P.S.  More on the holocaust... I can't let this opportunity go by now that I have your attention already.  Holocaust Remembrance Day is on Friday, May 2 this year, and I would like to give you some ideas for teaching your children about it. The other night when Thad and I got home from Bible study, some of our older daughters were watching The Hiding Place DVD about Corrie tenBoom's experience of being sent to Ravensbruck after being caught sheltering Jews.  I hadn't seen this movie in about 30 years, though we have read the The Hiding Place book.  I have also seen a fictionalized Trailblazer series biography for children. I spent a lot of time over the years teaching my children about the holocaust from various resources, such as The Young Underground series by Robert Elmer and the novels Behind the Bedroom Wall by Laura E. Williams, When Hitler Stole Pink Rabbit by Judith Kerr, and Number the Stars by Lois Lowry, among others.  For picture books we have also read The Butterfly by Patricia Polacco.  You will probably find these and many others in your local library. Some of my girls have visited our local holocaust museum in Maitland, Florida, and Mary and Ryan went to the United States Holocaust Memorial Museum in Washington D.C. just after Christmas. There is actually a worldwide directory of holocaust museums for those who are interested in going to one in their area.  You could break into this topic a little more gently with a study on Passover, which starts at sundown on April 19 this year.  Perhaps your family could attend a messianic Passover seder (haggadah) service this year or hold your own at home.  Home school mom Ann Voskamp has written an article on celebrating a messianic passover.  (The article is near the bottom of the page.  It is called "Answering Age Old Questions.")  You can easily find more detailed instructions on-line at many different sites or buy a kit such as the Passover Family Pack or Passover Starter Pack.   I hope that this motivates you to learn about Jewish heritage!

~*~*~